…is really the expression that summarizes my present state of mind. The job talk was, well, ok, but I was still pretty unhappy with it. I am telling myself that I treated it as a practice talk and thus included a bunch of things I wanted to try out, but the fact that this made it into a far less polished talk than I would have preferred to give still annoyed me. I did get a lot of really valuable feedback and know what I have to do in order to produce an effective final product, but I still always hate to intentionally present works in progress–seriously: HATE it. The negative effect of this is that I spent pretty much all day Saturday being angry at myself and dwelling on the shortcomings (a number of which were expected and even planned, as part of the whole “trying things out and seeing what works” plan). Still, I am not very good at dealing with presenting work that underwhelms myself.
Additionally, I got sick in Saturday and spent the last two days in bed trying to get rid of my fever (I gave the talk heavily medicated and thus did not feel it as much on Friday, but it really hit me Saturday morning). The fact that a window in my apartment is still broken and won’t close (which my landlord promised to fix weeks ago), which makes it ridiculously cold in here, does not help that situation. But, I got some vitamins, rested on Saturday and began doing work again yesterday afternoon as part of my attempt to tell my body to suck it up. Seriously–what’s the point of quitting smoking, if you get sick anyway?
Hence, I don’t really have much else to report. Oh, the ray of light in all this may be the series of funny comments I am getting on an old post I put up in February (on Angelina Jolie and the filmic adaptation of Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged). Shockingly enough (in more than one way), this post still brings me a lot of traffic and the occasional entertaining comment. For your personal enjoyment, you can find it here.